:) my reflection

There was a quote I placed in the box during the bonding camp in Punggol, during the Serve Philippines 2005 YEP group reflection time. We would sit in a big circle, scribble down our thoughts and feelings for the day and put it in a box. There was a day where I finally realized how meaningful this trip would and could be, and how lucky I felt to be part of this group.

“From nothing to something, from something to everything.”

It was a quote taken from a close friend, and it described this whole mission well. We all came from different lives and backgrounds; Ngee Ann Polytechnic, Teach Me Inc and Andrew and Grace Home. Being part of Andrew and Grace Home, I was apprehensive on how the other organizations would look at us. Do they see us as a bunch of mischievous girls who do not know right from wrong? I was also wondering how seemingly normal young adults from Ngee Ann Polytechnic and differently-abled people from Teach Me Inc could possibly blend in and do something meaningful. I was indeed doubtful.

Right in the beginning, I was not told that it was a combined trip. And many others like me did not look forward to the bonding camp in Punggol. However, the camp brought out a spark within; it gave me hope and showed me a glimpse of what team spirit can do. Highly geared up from the camp, leaving Singapore to take on a whole new mission was an easy task.

Honestly, living in such unfamiliar grounds with 32 other acquaintances is not as simple as it seems. Throughout the trip there were some hiccups, some disagreements, some conflicts. We hid them with cheery “Thank you very much”s and uncontrolled laughter during contact with the Filipinos. We went all bitter and some were ready to give up, wanting to fly back to Singapore immediately and to forget that this trip ever happened. And I was one of those few, until realization hit me.

I was helping a fellow teammate wash up. She was wheelchair-bound and had difficulty climbing the stairs, going to the restrooms and bathing. It took her much effort just to step out of the room. And as we went to the room where she was going to bathe, it just hit me right on the spot. There we were, upset about such petty and trivial things, that we did not see the simplest logic behind it all. We all came to learn. We came with hearts to inspire and give. We wanted to help the Filipinos and at the same time, learn from them as well. Some might have even come on this trip in order to understand the plight of the disabled and to offer them a helping hand. Most of us want to make a difference.

Like the colours of a sunset, it is how you look at it. Some might choose to look at the darkening hues that are highly hung, while others might focus on the watercolour reds below, the remains of the sun. Many times we come with a purpose, but leave with bitterness. I am glad to say that for this trip, however, we came back changed. And we did make a difference, when tears from our Filipino friends fell from their eyes. It was something out of plain nothing, which like our team leader said, “making things happen”, where we took it in our own hands and made that something everything.

Friendships and Memories and More

Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he will eat for a life time a phrase Peiqi quoted and one that I could agree with more also. Well what happened on the trip is truly on of passion and understanding not only of all the people on the trip but also of all the people we interacted with during our trip be they Filipino or American.

Looking back I realize on thing all of us be it the team or the people we interacted with did one thing on this trip showed one thing and passion for what we do and compassion for each other. This can be seen by the gracious of our hosts and what they did before and during our stay there, the Americans from the Peace Corps who were willing to give up 2 years of their lives for people they don't even know and even for the other Filipinos like Mayor and Dr. Banias and even Mrs. Laura G. Villarico who played a gracious hosts to us on more than one occasion and through our willingness to actually sacrifice a holiday just to serve the people there seen in the sacrifice all of us made at some point of time on the trip. For me I also took it that when I signed up it was form of dedication to go over to the Philippines to rough it out or to put it harshly suffer.

But when I came I was all ready for something to and that was to receive while I served. I was hoping that I would be able to serve more than we would receive. Well when I look back I realize one thing about and that is I gained more than we expected and gave less than what I hoped to give. Firstly, because we failed to set up the computer lab due in part to the failure of the computers to arrive on time. Secondly, because as I look back I really feel that whatever i did was so minute as to what everyone else did as a whole. I now see myself more as a piece of the puzzle and not as what I would think as one who made a big sacrifice.

I also learnt a whole much more whether being on time or even things like even if you want to speak you should learn to be more tactful when voicing your opinions as well. I also learnt not to be so idealistic as well. I believe these lessons would also be a crucial in life. I learnt this through feedback from Miss Nellie Chew and Mr. Leow and others in the camp. I also learnt that I should be a better listener as seemed as though I was a person that practiced a lot of selective listening.

With Regards to some of the things I learnt from my fellow participants, I learnt how to take care of the handicapped when I was helping out Navin and Yuen Ping participants from Teach Me Inc. He also reminded me about how I used take care of my grandmother. This helped me to be more patient and also to help him improve himself. This also helped look at things from a different perspective that I have not used in many years, Navin and Yuen Ping and the people from the Association of Differently-Abled Persons, Iloilo allowed me to look at things from a disabled person’s perspective and to see the certain challenges they faced and how they solved and countered them.

In conclusion, I am thankful and grateful for the honour, opportunity and privilege to be part of this team that went over to Iloilo City in the Philippines. Friendships and learning experiences are truly the things that make us better persons in life and without them we will all be stagnant beings. Most importantly, I learnt that it is true about another phrase we heard a lot in camp and on the trip, One Team One Spirit One Soul, without this the team would have broken up as this was something we lived by.

Iloilo City will forever remain as a memory in my mind, For all the treasures as well as friendships that i cultivated and built over the trip and all its meetings before and after.

tired after the trip...

sigh...back in singapore....feels good...but totally missed the people in philippines sia...sigh...also looking at a few reflections...hmm...sigh again~~ my english aint that good...but i will still reflect...

can really say that i learnt alot throughout this trip...i made things happen...i wait for things to happen...of coz....i see things happen too....who doesnt?? anyway, i also see things happening around me...awareness got a little higher (although people say that my awareness is zero)...i think im far better than before liao...but its quite tiring to be aware of what is happening around me every second...very tiring i can say...

this trip wasnt really counted as a success...we were supposed to set up IT lab for the people there...but we didnt manage to, due to some unforeseen situation...but we still managed to transfer IT skills to the people at SPED school and popcom...while transferring skills to them...we get to interact with them too...i personally havent taught at popcom before...coz have been assigned to teach at SPED school...a class of like 11 people...but there's always like 6 or 7 students only...hee...i gotta say, the students there get distracted real easily...i remembered the very first lesson we had with them...we were offered food and drinks...it seems more like a interacting session...a get-to-know-you session...they are so friendly...so enthusiastic in learning too...basically, most of them already know some basics of the microsoft office...so its quite ok to teach them...from what i remembered, they are such keen learners when it comes to microsoft powerpoint...so passionate i realised too...coz when we asked them to create a powerpoint on their own...they created stuffs like "Mother's Day" or things that gotta do with love...so passionate subjects...envy their passion for one another...there's this grandma, Elsa...always with a camera....always touched by her smile...and not to forget Hose, who brought us to the wet market to buy the cheapest ingredients...and of coz other teachers there who helped us in one way or another, such as Glenda and Vanessa etc...

also like what peiqi said...we have unknowingly called SPED school, the place given to us to stay for the 2 weeks, as our home...we will unknowingly say "hey...time to go home le!"...enjoyed the times when we go for groceries shopping as a group...then we all go home to cook...also buying things that our home lack, like rubbish bags, detergent, washing detergent etc...we cleaned and cleared up the place...making it like our home, as we will be staying there for 2 weeks...we had our meals there...we sleep on the hard floors there...bathe there...we shit there...we had our reflections there...during our free time, we played..frisbee...basketball...we slacked...we napped...we nagged at one another...sometimes, we complained to one another about this and that....some of us even broke down and cried...well...i did....for something i shouldnt have said...being childish and saying things without thinking of the consequences...purely stupidity too...but well....we all grow up through learning from our mistakes....so i learnt a lesson...

well...my stay in the hospital was also memorable...not much people get to stay in hospital while overseas lar...hmm...but well...not that i want to...high fever plus allergy...sigh...anyway, i got to see the responsibility of the nurses and doctors there...there's this 19-year-old male nurse, Chriss...the one who attended to me...well...chatted a little while...got to understand how their working life is like...he kept saying that he wants to come to Singapore to work...cant imagine he's only 19 years old, and already full of ambitions...looking at myself...hmm...20 years old...unemployed...sigh~~

the homestay was also very new to me...too bad we didnt get to spend more time with them...a night is definitely not enough, i can say...but through this only night...my host, Donna, was really hospitable...even the hyperactive 5-year-old niece of hers...totally showed the hospitability of filipinos...even prepared a room for us...showing full friendliness, although we are like total strangers to them...the only thing i regret not doing is to take a photo with them...gosh...how can i forget...well...i did forgot...sigh~

i remembered the time when we were at SIF...we were asked whether we will give more or receive more?? hmm...i think that time my answer was that i will give and receive the same amount...but i realised...i received really more than i have given...the filipinos have taught us alot of things without us realising it...well..some of us certainly have given more than they would have given...going over their limits...doing things that they would never imagine they will do in their lives...full of admire for them too...i guess sometimes i wont even go to that extent to do such a thing for a person..."never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game"...some quote i heard somewhere...neber to give up...something that i kept telling myself throughout the trip...but i guess i kinda stress myself too much...but i feel that i have shown more leadership skills than i would have...quite a great achievement for me...some people bring out the leadership in me...some people helped mi in leading...some people work with mi to lead...there are so many different categories of people...

some participants of this team made mi realised that i dont appreciate the life im living...there are people who have a far worse life than mi and they are stronger than mi...there's yuanping...who really changed a lot from before the trip, to during the trip, to after the trip...she has an improve in her attitude...there's lek...who made mi realised that life can still goes on even if it gets a little rough...i admire her...for her braveness to carry on her life despite her illness...there's the AG gers...they made mi change my thinking of typical home girls...intially i thought girls from such homes wont be too good...but i was wrong..totally wrong...these AG gers made mi feel the love in Andrew and Grace Home...there's the Teach Me people...they made mi change my thinking of differently-abled people too...gotta admit that before this trip...whenever i go on the road and see such people...i will tend to give them a second, or even a third look...the way the walk...the things they do....but after i interact with them...i realised that they are the same as us...now, when we go out with them...when i see people staring at them...i would just feel like telling them not to stare...because they are normal too....but in some way, i cant...anyway, there's also navin...the guy whom we thought brought us alot of problems...but he made me understand that life is never easy...i feel that the Teach Me people has taken a big step by being on this trip...being more independent...as i was saying, nobody's life is easy...life is full of ups and downs...sometimes when something happen...a scar will be left there....so it wont get back to normal again that fast...but with the willingness to forgive and forget...things might get better...also, i get to see the true selves of the yep people...including myself...there's good and bad...there's happy and sad...there is bound to be...

well...i feel that the facilitators did quite a pretty good job in guiding us...they have been through a lot too i guess...also, they have taught mi alot...directly and indirectly...but sometimes...they do things without telling others the reason why they do it...which makes it kinda tough for both us and them...it would have been easier if we were told ba...anyway, its also good...they got us all thinking...brain cells improve alot...hee...this trip has made mi tired physically and mentally...a very tiring trip indeed...

the memories will remain in mi...the experiences...missed the philippines people...missed the yep team...wishing that we could go back one more time...this time maybe to fulfil the initial objectives of our trip...that is to build the IT lab...or maybe just to visit the people there...to just have fun and enjoy ourselves...

back to a place i called home

Dear all,
From this trip i serve and learn at e same time, what i learn was I am surprised that our counterparts was so keen to learn despite the lack of computers, that is the point i ought to learn from them. If you ask me if there would be another trip back there, i will say i w go back again to meet my friends there.

after Effects of Yep

my expectation did met.. and i hope i did become a better person.

=)

we are back!

back from the trip le...missed the philippines ppl...missed SPED sch....missed the whole YEP team already!! gosh...sigh~~

my expectations are mostly met le...which is good ba...hee....

oh manz...totally missed everyone lar....life seems different le...wonder when will be the next time i can actually see the Teach Me people and the AG gers...gosh...even the np ppl too....coz well....afterall, im a graduate le..hee...

feeling bored at the moment...

hey...got friendster or msn...juz gif ur email add here leh....mine's lina_lim_85@hotmail.com

hee...ok...signing out...boredz!

Self- expectation
- empathy
- learn more about other values and culture
- more independent
- i wan to provide a service learning to the people there.
- i wan to be able to achieve our motto
- to do IT transfer
- learn to take initiative more
- more understanding
- i wan to be able to value relationship with ppl more
- be contented of life

Group- expectation
- I hope that every single one in the group can be in auto mode, be a bunch of people who make things happened.
- be more understanding and have higher tolerant level

expectations of all expectations?? =P

personal expectations: -1- to learn more about phlippines's culture and the way they live their lives -2- to set up the computer lab (which i tink we will) -3- to be able to teach them the IT courses (praying real hard tt we realli can) -4- be able to open up to others and make more new frenz -5- be more initiative (making things happen) =P -6- definitely, to understand myself better...and to understand people around mi too -7- actually also to see whether i am able to put up with such toughness -8- having a real sense of satisfaction when everything's done

group expectations: -1- definitely, to have an open mind -2- being able to understand one another better, be it strengths or weaknesses -3- to be able to work as a team -4- to be equal...everyone is a leader...nobody is to be bossed around by anybody...

so that's abt it lar...blog totally for the sake of blogging..dohz...
--> lina